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Right, this section needs some more life in it so I thought we could do with a general 'in the news' type chat thread. So if you've got some thoughts on that maniac pilot, ISIS brides, Clarkson, Harold leaving One Direction, etc. or just want to say how sexy you thought Ed Miliband was looking the other night, here's the place to do it. Away you go......

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Right, this section needs some more life in it so I thought we could do with a general 'in the news' type chat thread. So if you've got some thoughts on that maniac pilot, ISIS brides, Clarkson, Harold leaving One Direction, etc. or just want to say how sexy you thought Ed Miliband was looking the other night, here's the place to do it. Away you go......

 

Unfortunately mate the calibre of poster isn't up to much on here for that sort of thing. It's all a bit ''Loose women'' kinda mentality if you catch my drift.

 

TRFF it ain't. e5046167.gif

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can I also add things that annoy me on a daily basis as I was going to start a general annoyance thread?

 

today what I realised annoyed me extremely was people trying to rush in crowded areas. it is so annoying. As I exited the tube a women was clearly trying to get past - what for I do not know as in front of me it is chocker block as well - and she was buzzing behind my back like a fucking angry hornet

 

we get on the escalator and we are walking up as opposed to standing there to go up and still with someone in front of me she is hovering around

 

I wanted to turn round and smash her in the face. we reach the ticket barrier - buzz buzz buzz

 

Anyway - there is another escalator going up to street level and now I have my elbows out and she is practically on my back and making a strange aggravated noise

 

so I did a little fart as well which she must have smelled

 

and then we reached street level and she ran weaving in and out of the traffic. Also what annoyed me about her was that she had on a business suit and trainers. I hate that. and they are always shit ASIC's trainers

 

moral of the story - get up earlier you lazy **** rather than trying to rush in London at rush hour

Edited by E R

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Thing annoying me at the minute. The 4 thousand odd fuckwits who comment every day on the Daily Mail website re: Jeremy fucking Clarkson. Then shit like ''flaunts her bikini body/washboard stomach''...''shows (insert some cunts name here) what he's missing'' & other womens news bollocks.

 

Yet some piffling issue like a pensioner getting their head stamped on for thruppence ha'penny gets 25 comments.

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I love it when cunts in cars drive right up my arse. Some slag did it last night along our street, it's a 20 mph limit with speed bumps. My car is really low so I have to go very slowly over them. However, as she was being such a stupid bint and driving so close to my rear bumper I could almost smell her curry breath I drove at 5mph all down my road.

 

She was fucking fuming. She was swerving all over the road to make it clear I was driving too slowly. At that point I looked in my mirror to see her waving her hands in the air and giving me the 'wanker' sign. It was at this point I waved two fingers in the air and slowed to under 5mph. I thought she was going to have a fucking coronary!

 

Moral of the story - don't drive like a twat in MY street.

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I love it when cunts in cars drive right up my arse. Some slag did it last night along our street, it's a 20 mph limit with speed bumps. My car is really low so I have to go very slowly over them. However, as she was being such a stupid bint and driving so close to my rear bumper I could almost smell her curry breath I drove at 5mph all down my road.

 

She was fucking fuming. She was swerving all over the road to make it clear I was driving too slowly. At that point I looked in my mirror to see her waving her hands in the air and giving me the 'wanker' sign. It was at this point I waved two fingers in the air and slowed to under 5mph. I thought she was going to have a fucking coronary!

 

Moral of the story - don't drive like a twat in MY street.

 

 

i had something similar like that happen recent. down our dirt track lane there is a dirty curve and a small bridge. only other thing down my lane is an oap home

 

this **** women the other day came round the corner doing 40 in a 10mph lane where my kids sometimes walk outside the gate. i was in my truck and gospel truth just aimed her. i couldn't have moved anyway and it she hit my pick up she would be dead now. so she ploughed across the field and through this hedge is a white seat leon

 

the scratches down it looked like freddy kruger had raped it

 

she jumped out and sort of went "i don't know why i was going so fast" :worried_anim:

 

i didn't even say anything but she was clearly scared to shit and imagined i was about to go mad. so said i am calling the nursing home as my kids use this lane and drove off. she knocked on our house and went to my missus later her mum is ill, sorry blah blah

 

Alright but she wouldn't have stopped if my kid was on that road :thumbsdown_still:

Edited by E R

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that cartoon tattoo on his arm lol

 

the other day i heard him say he was so poor that he used to sleep on the circle line and now women are all over him :sick02:

 

i bet not on a hot day they aint you ginger dog

 

it was like when faceman used to come up to the city that summer dressed in a pin striped suit and buy my banker friends champagne to pretend he was one of us but really we just drank his champagne and held our noses from his ginger sun smell

 

soulless ginger

 

gingersoul.jpeg

Edited by E R

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i had something similar like that happen recent. down our dirt track lane there is a dirty curve and a small bridge. only other thing down my lane is an oap home

 

this **** women the other day came round the corner doing 40 in a 10mph lane where my kids sometimes walk outside the gate. i was in my truck and gospel truth just aimed her. i couldn't have moved anyway and it she hit my pick up she would be dead now. so she ploughed across the field and through this hedge is a white seat leon

 

the scratches down it looked like freddy kruger had raped it

 

she jumped out and sort of went "i don't know why i was going so fast" :worried_anim:

 

i didn't even say anything but she was clearly scared to shit and imagined i was about to go mad. so said i am calling the nursing home as my kids use this lane and drove off. she knocked on our house and went to my missus later her mum is ill, sorry blah blah

 

Alright but she wouldn't have stopped if my kid was on that road :thumbsdown_still:

I normally drive quickly - maybe a bit too quickly but I do that on a dual carriageway or a motorway where there is no chance of knocking a kid over. It's fucking stupid to drive in a residential area or down a single track road like a dick. You're asking for trouble if you do.

 

She was in a fucking Chelsea tractor in a middle class suburban street in Ealing. Stupid cunts.

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270C9FE200000578-0-image-a-95_1427466403

 

This fucking boring prick.

 

He is fucking boring but to be fair he comes across as a nice chap. He turned up at some random person's wedding as their first dance was one of his songs. Fuck knows how he heard about it but he arrived, played the song live and then fucked off.

 

Red trainers are a fucking no-no though.

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that cartoon tattoo on his arm lol

 

the other day i heard him say he was so poor that he used to sleep on the circle line and now women are all over him :sick02:

 

 

What do birds see in him? Hyacinth doesn't stop playing his music but I can't fucking stand it. It's wimpy boring shit. Why would some Victoria's secret model want to slurp on the chap of some bog eyed ginger mess just because he can play the guitar & sing like Julian fucking Clary?

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that cartoon tattoo on his arm lol

 

the other day i heard him say he was so poor that he used to sleep on the circle line and now women are all over him :sick02:

 

i bet not on a hot day they aint you ginger dog

 

it was like when faceman used to come up to the city that summer dressed in a pin striped suit and buy my banker friends champagne to pretend he was one of us but really we just drank his champagne and held our noses from his ginger sun smell

 

soulless ginger

 

gingersoul.jpeg

 

I can't remember ever buying one of your types champagne and I've never been called ginger... Anyway, keep fishing fat boy...

 

maxresdefault.jpg

Edited by Faceman

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What do birds see in him?

Hmm. I wonder what it could be whenever a bloke who most women wouldn't touch with a shitty stick suddenly becomes irresistible to them. I think the clue is here.

post-485-0-19862100-1427476459_thumb.jpg

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Sam Smith, every single one of his songs is just him whinging in a high pitched voice. What a boring tedious bastard he is.

 

Girls trying to kill themselves because someone left a manufactured miming boy group.

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Our lass wanted a coffee when we were out and about the other week so we nipped into one of the thousands of coffee shops in Leeds. She ordered her frappe-whatever, '...and for you sir?'. 'Just a cup of tea please'. 'Would that be English breakfast tea?'. FUCK OFF!

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Our lass wanted a coffee when we were out and about the other week so we nipped into one of the thousands of coffee shops in Leeds. She ordered her frappe-whatever, '...and for you sir?'. 'Just a cup of tea please'. 'Would that be English breakfast tea?'. FUCK OFF!

 

 

I work for a huge multi national company on the tools, sort of glorified caretaker, building maintenance that kind of thing. One of my duties is I have to service 7 drinks machines every monday, drain them out, clean the pipes etc etc. Anyway, its decent slurp & its free. I'm at my desk one morning & there's a drink machine next to my desk, gives me a chance to flirt with the skirt 'n all. Anyway, this new office twat, stencilled on beard, gelled parrot hair, pointy shoes, soft hands, you know the type, pipes up ''Um, do you have a decaf option?'' I replied, ''mate, 30 year ago I was drinking my tea from a dirty old urn & shitting in a bucket, and you're asking me if there's a fucking decaf option?'', Prick nearly died. e32438.gif

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My office is full of wankers like that. The other day we were all given a document to read through before attending a meeting. One tosspot piped up 'is it possible to have a soft copy sent over?' What a total fucking ****.

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Political TV debates.

 

Bollocks, bollocks, and more bollocks

I do wish they'd spice these things up by having them neck seven or eight pints before they come on and have it out.

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Those people really agitating to get past in crowded areas are weird. How much ground are they actually going to make up anyway? They'll probably only get there one minute sooner than if they just strolled all the way. Then when they get there they're all agitated and sweaty. Just accept you're going to be late and use the extra time to come up with a good excuse.

 

On the driving thing, there are some country type roads near me and although it's technically a 60 limit it's really not safe to go over 40. Every time I'm on there some maniac is driving really close behind itching to get past, obviously that just makes me go even slower, until they perform a dangerous overtaking manoeuvre. So many times I've seen near misses from people who can't just relax and wait for bit. I'm quite looking forward to when eventually one of them ends up a ditch :thumbsup_still:

 

In a couple of minutes you're into residential area with loads of junctions and traffic lights so you don't really get anywhere any faster. I usually end up sat alongside or right behind these morons at some lights ten minutes later anyway.

 

Thing annoying me at the minute. The 4 thousand odd fuckwits who comment every day on the Daily Mail website re: Jeremy fucking Clarkson. Then shit like ''flaunts her bikini body/washboard stomach''...''shows (insert some cunts name here) what he's missing'' & other womens news bollocks.

 

I'm quite often on the Mail website and those 'womens' stories down the side are embarassing. Dozens of them ever day all with the same standard headline of [celebrity name] looking [adjective] in [description of what they are wearing]. Imagine if they started doing those stories about men and passing it off as news:

 

"Richard Madeley looking youthful in a new jacket"

 

"Russell Brand shows off his long legs in tight jeans"

 

"Jeff Stelling looking his age as he goes shopping makeup free"

 

Ridiculous. The weirdest of all is when they do it with little kids. For a while they were obsessed with Katie Holmes's daughter and would have loads of pictures with captions about her showing off her "shapely legs" or whatever. Creepy.

 

(I don't really know who that ginger bloke is. Not faceman, the other one I mean.)

Edited by Art Vandelay

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Hmm. I wonder what it could be whenever a bloke who most women wouldn't touch with a shitty stick suddenly becomes irresistible to them. I think the clue is here.

People say that to my missus all the time lol

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I normally drive quickly - maybe a bit too quickly but I do that on a dual carriageway or a motorway where there is no chance of knocking a kid over. It's fucking stupid to drive in a residential area or down a single track road like a dick. You're asking for trouble if you do.

 

She was in a fucking Chelsea tractor in a middle class suburban street in Ealing. Stupid cunts.

Honest mate I was so angry. Would she have said the same if she wiped one of my kids out. I genuinely would have beaten her to death and taken a chance on diminished the Orange faced prat

 

As you say I drive a bit too quick at time on the motorway and do track days. But driving fast near a school for example just makes you a dirty scumbag

 

Anyway F1 qualy is on

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Those people really agitating to get past in crowded areas are weird. How much ground are they actually going to make up anyway? They'll probably only get there one minute sooner than if they just strolled all the way. Then when they get there they're all agitated and sweaty. Just accept you're going to be late and use the extra time to come up with a good excuse.

 

On the driving thing, there are some country type roads near me and although it's technically a 60 limit it's really not safe to go over 40. Every time I'm on there some maniac is driving really close behind itching to get past, obviously that just makes me go even slower, until they perform a dangerous overtaking manoeuvre. So many times I've seen near misses from people who can't just relax and wait for bit. I'm quite looking forward to when eventually one of them ends up a ditch :thumbsup_still:

 

In a couple of minutes you're into residential area with loads of junctions and traffic lights so you don't really get anywhere any faster. I usually end up sat alongside or right behind these morons at some lights ten minutes later anyway.

 

 

 

I'm quite often on the Mail website and those 'womens' stories down the side are embarassing. Dozens of them ever day all with the same standard headline of [celebrity name] looking [adjective] in [description of what they are wearing]. Imagine if they started doing those stories about men and passing it off as news:

 

"Richard Madeley looking youthful in a new jacket"

 

"Russell Brand shows off his long legs in tight jeans"

 

"Jeff Stelling looking his age as he goes shopping makeup free"

 

Ridiculous. The weirdest of all is when they do it with little kids. For a while they were obsessed with Katie Holmes's daughter and would have loads of pictures with captions about her showing off her "shapely legs" or whatever. Creepy.

 

(I don't really know who that ginger bloke is. Not faceman, the other one I mean.)

Russell fucking Brand ..... What a total fuckwitt that bloke is . Talentless hairbag that's full of himself , pure undiluted shit !!!

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M favourite thing Russell the most unfunny comedian in the world Brand did was when he went on a march about empty properties and they said but don't you yourself own 2 house and a flat and your are single

 

Silly wanker

 

One of my favourite f1 stories is how after winning 3 world titles in a row, red bull are threatening to pull out of formula 1 because the Mercedes is too fast ha ha

 

They are demanding the f1 bosses figure out a way to penalise the Mercedes so they can start winning again lol

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